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Time Heist finds the TARDIS’ phone ringing. Very few people have his number, and “nothing can happen just by answering the phone”, but he does so, and something does happen, and both he and Clara are transported to a room with an augmented human called Psi (Green Wing‘s Jonathan Bailey), and a mutant human called Saibra (The Smoke‘s Pippa Bennett-Warner).
They’ve agreed to have their memories wiped with a memory worm… but they don’t remember why…
Anyhoo, in the search for a decent new episode after Robot of Sherwood and Listen, all four of them have to rob the Bank of Karabraxos. If they don’t, they die. And they’ve got to get past Head of Bank Security is Ms Delphox (Keeley Hawes, so damn good in Line of Duty, earlier this year), and if she detects you have criminal intent, your mind will be wiped by The Teller (Ross Mullan), and your brain turned into ‘soup’.
Saibra’s special talent is to replicate any other being, thanks to her hologram shell. If only I could get her to replicate me, and then she could take my place at work.
Psi, on the otherhand, has computer hacking skills. Not as cool, really.
Some good stuff… There’s a nice put-down after Psi snaps at The Doctor, with him replying with sarcasm, “Look, when we’re done, you go and find a shoulder to cry on. Until then, what you need is me.”
And elsewhere, Psi tells him: “I still don’t understand why *you’re* in charge”, to which the Doctor comes back with: “Basically, it’s the eyebrows.”
We also get a nice moment where they blow a hole in a lift floor with a ‘dimensional shift bomb’, which temporarily relocates the particles to a different plane – a safer way of making an explosion-free hole, but it does get a bit daft with other elements like wiping your memory to reduce the guilt in your mind, so you can’t be detected.
For the rest of the time, it hints at being a bit ‘Crystal Maze’ as they come across puzzles which need solving, created by the hand of The Architect, but it really just boils down to a load of running down corridors – and seemingly easily disposable tertiary characters, as The Teller goes after them.
Go to page 2 for more thoughts on the episode.
So, overall, this was a rather average episode – especially since it all becomes rather obvious who rang the TARDIS in the first place, but on the plus side, Jenna Coleman again looked stunning as Clara, this time wearing a trouser suit with a white blouse and not-quite-done-up tie. And Keeley Hawes is always welcome, especially as she hams it up nicely in the baddie role, albeit a way too brief one.
And check out these pics from @MissKeeleyHawes, containing a pic of her and Madame Karabraxos.
Take a bow Ms Delphox… pic.twitter.com/YQUmDEXzzl
— Keeley Hawes (@Misskeeleyhawes) September 20, 2014
And Madame Karabraxos… pic.twitter.com/HZp11B8QrG
— Keeley Hawes (@Misskeeleyhawes) September 20, 2014
But what was the deal with The Doctor making a ‘call me’ symbol to Psi towards the end? In Russell T Davies’ time, he made it his life’s work to give The Doctor ambiguous sexuality, getting Christopher Eccleston to dance with Captain Jack in… The Doctor Dances (shittest ever Doctor Who episode title ever); then Daleks In Manhattan saw David Tennant said a woman who rescued him deserved a big kiss, and also shouted to half-pig Frank, “You too, Frank!” Er… why?
And even Steven Moffat seems to have dabbled in this bizarre and unnecessary addition to the script from time to time. Why?
Next time: The Doctor becomes the caretaker at Clara’s school, while she still tries to go on a date with Mr Pink. Who doesn’t tip. Possibly. Yes, I’ll keep making that joke. I’m here all week, try the fish. And, all series.
Score: 6/10
Director: Douglas Mackinnon
Producer: Peter Bennett
Screenplay: Steve Thompson and Steven Moffat
Music: Murray Gold
Cast:
The Doctor: Peter Capaldi
Clara Oswald: Jenna Coleman
Ms Delphox/Madame Karabraxos: Keeley Hawes
Psi: Jonathan Bailey
Saibra: Pippa Bennett-Warner
Guard: Mark Ebulue
Mr Porrima: Trevor Sellers
Suited Customer: Junior Laniyan
The Teller: Ross Mullan
Danny Pink: Samuel Anderson
Reviewer of movies, videogames and music since 1994. Aortic valve operation survivor from the same year. Running DVDfever.co.uk since 2000. Nobel Peace Prize winner 2021.
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