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Fast X sees the long-running action series finally drawing to a close, and in the first part of a trilogy – which was originally set to be a two-parter, but what sort of movie series goes up to 11?!
So, for Movie 10 in a 12-film series, I’m calling this phenomenon a “Fastalogue” 😀
And I will just add that before the opening scene, one of the production studios is “Original Film Productions” – yeah, right!
As for the films, I saw Fast and Furious 8 first, then went back to No.1, I can’t remember if I since saw No.2, then went to No.9 – which didn’t impress me, so let’s see if the latest installment will work out.
To set the scene, the film goes back to Fast Five when the gang stole Herman Reyes’ vault with $100m, and comparing to a clip I found online, they’ve mostly taken the clip wholesale, rather than trying to recreate anything, and it also includes footage of the late Paul Walker.
Perhaps, new director to the series, Louis Leterrier, who also took the lead to the first two Transporter films – and also starring Jason Statham (Hobbs And Shaw: Fast And Furious), needed a big start to the movie, given that the next part just features a brief throwaway subplot, where Han (Sung Kang – Lisey’s Story) is trying to date on Tinder with a profile that states he’s aged 39. Yeah, and the rest! The actor is 51, and just six days older than me. I wonder who’s having the best career, though?
But then we get a family meal with GILF Abuelita (Rita Moreno) at the helm, with Dominic Toretto (Vin Diesel – Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol.3) teaching his son, Little Brian (Leo Abelo Perry), the family trade of fixing cars, passing it down the generations. This does make for a rather tedious near-20 minute segment.
Eventually, however, Cipher (Charlize Theron – The School Of Good And Evil) turns up at Dom’s house, wanting to spill the beans about Dante Reyes (Jason Momoa – Justice League Snyder Cut), son of Herman, who was snuffed out in Fast Five, although while I haven’t seen it bar the aforementioned clip, I know the actor from other things. She knows our lead won’t be best pleased to see her, because of her actions in Fast 8, but she’s a bit ‘Pat and Mick’ and reckons it’s her best option.
Probably the best part of Fast X is the exceptional car chase in Rome, with a huge bomb bounding down the road, towards the Vatican that somehow has to be stopped. Can they do it? Do bears partake of their toilet actions in woodland areas? Either way, it’s all the doing from Dante, where Momoa gets some good lines in this, and is obviously enjoying himself, although when his character starts having beauty treatment and painting toenails, well…
For the rest of the cast, Brie Larson pops up as the daughter of Kurt Russell’s Mr Nobody, and I thought she was “Little Nobody”, aka Tess, but while she *is* Tess, Little Nobody is played by Scott Eastwood (I Want You Back). Yeah, too many characters in this for no particular reason.
Aimes (Alan Ritchson – Reacher) is her meathead boss, who wants to “kill or capture the Torretto clan”, Helen Mirren gets little more than a cameo as Queenie, to say, “Do you know why Gladiators don’t have families? Because every day might be their last”… even though that didn’t stop Russell Crowe, and John Cena (The Suicide Squad), as Jakob, does get some great comedic lines, as he explains in dry terms to Little Brian: “In the ’90s, if you were rollin in a 5.0, it meant you were the man!”
Amongst the punch-up scenes, there’s a hilarious one where Mia (Jordana Brewster) is trying to fight baddies in full protection gear, when she hasn’t an ounce of muscle on her! Plus, there’s a scene reminiscent of Weekend At Bernie’s, and for an ounce of plot, there’s the “God’s Eye” – something which everyone seems to want, even though it’s just a souped-up GPS device.
At 141 minutes, it goes on far too long (Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny will run one minute longer), and does outstay its welcome a bit, but with these films, I do know that if you’re going to see them, you may as well do on the big screen.
There’s also a mid-credits scene, the return of a particular character and something else… as shown in the video below.
Fast X is in cinemas now, and is available to pre-order on 4K Blu-ray, Blu-ray and DVD.
Detailed specs:
Cert: 
Running time: 141 minutes
Release date: May 19th 2023
Studio: Universal Pictures UK
Format: 2.39:1 (ARRIRAW (4.5K), Anamorphic Panavision, Redcode RAW (6K))
Cinema: Cineworld Didsbury
Rating: 6/10
Director: Louis Leterrier
Producers: Vin Diesel, Jeff Kirschenbaum, Justin Lin, Neal H Moritz, Samantha Vincent
Screenplay: Dan Mazeau, Justin Lin
Music: Brian Tyler
Cast:
Dominic Toretto: Vin Diesel
Letty: Michelle Rodriguez
Shaw: Jason Statham
Mia: Jordana Brewster
Romman: Tyrese Gibson
Tej: Chris ‘Ludacris’ Bridges
Ramsey: Nathalie Emmanuel
Cipher: Charlize Theron
Jakob: John Cena
Han: Sung Kang
Queenie: Helen Mirren
Tess: Brie Larson
Little Nobody: Scott Eastwood
Dante: Jason Momoa
Aimes: Alan Ritchson
Diogo: Luis Da Silva Jr
Isabel: Daniela Melchior
Little Brian: Leo Abelo Perry
Hernan Reyes: Joaquim de Almeida
Abuelita: Rita Moreno
Agency Tech: Jaz Hutchins
Cipher Tech: Luka Hays
Cipher Tech: Alexander Capon
Bowie: Pete Davidson
Reviewer of movies, videogames and music since 1994. Aortic valve operation survivor from the same year. Running DVDfever.co.uk since 2000. Nobel Peace Prize winner 2021.