74 (70) Lady Gaga – Poker Face

D E C E M B E R 5 T H 2 0 0 9
[This week’s digest] [New Singles Release Info]

[Album Charts] [New Albums Release Info]

[Last week’s chart] [Current week’s chart]

[Chart archive – March 1997 to date]

This week: 6 new entries, 1 chart, 0 re-entering, 5 climbing, 4 not moving & 23 downers.
new entry re-entry climber faller non mover
CHART TIME !

(* – my current favourites)
(!!! – Single Of The Week!!!)
(:O === the current all-time hate that makes even my smilie want to hurl!)
( (R) – Repeat., ie. a re-release)

A brief analysis on the current chart situation…

    5 new, 1 chart and 0 re-entering and entries :

    • 6 Rihanna – Russian Roulette
    • 9 Susan Boyle – Wild Horses
    • 19 Mariah Carey – I Want To Know What Love Is
    • 30 Lady Gaga feat. Beyonce – Telephone
    • 36 (44 CH) Chipmunk Feat. Talay Riley – Look For Me
    • 37 Susan Boyle – I Dreamed A Dream so the following dropped out :
      • 40 Agnes – I Need You Now
      • 39 Journey – Don’t Stop Believin’
      • 37 Robbie Williams – Bodies
      • 35 Calvin Harris – Flashback
      • 34 Shakira – She Wolf
      • 30 Miley Cyrus – Party In The USA

      7 climbing :

      • 1 (18) Peter Kay’s All Star Band – The Official BBC Children In Need Medley
      • 5 (8) Lady Gaga – Bad Romance
      • 15 (24) Michael Buble – Haven’t Met You Yet
      • 16 (20) Pixie Lott – Cry Me Out
      • 32 (33) Taio Cruz – Break Your Heart
      • 33 (38) Taken By Trees – Sweet Child O’ Mine
      • 35 (36) David Guetta feat. Akon – Sexy Chick

      4 not moving :

      • 3 Jason Derulo – Whatcha Say
      • 7 Kesha – Tik Tok
      • 12 Jay Sean feat. Lil Wayne – Down
      • 28 Whitney Houston – Million Dollar Bill

      and 23 going down. Big fallers include:

      • 10 (4) Leona Lewis – Happy
      • 23 (13) Sugababes – About A Girl
      • 26 (15) Alesha Dixon – To Love Again
      • 31 (21) Chase & Status Ft Plan B – End Credits
      • 34 (26) Shakira – Did It Again

      New entries from No.41-75 :

      • 45 Rihanna – Wait Your Turn
      • 51 (RE) Mariah Carey – All I Want For Christmas Is You
      • 56 (RE) Snow Patrol & Martha Wainwright – Set The Fire To The Third Bar
      • 58 (RE) The Pogues feat. Kirsty Maccoll – Fairytale Of New York
      • 62 Mariah Carey – Obsessed
      • 63 Taio Cruz – No Other One
      • 68 Lady Gaga – Monster
      • 72 Mika – Rain
      • 75 Lady Gaga – Alejandro

      Of this week’s highlights and lowlights…

      Lady Gaga: Poker Face
      [The Fame]

      74 (70) Lady Gaga – Poker Face

      I’d probably poker in the face, but I wouldn’t choose to listen to this tedious excuse for music.

      Note that the video link below goes via Youtubeproxy.com so you’ll be able to view the video from within the UK.

      Click here for the video

      Black Eyed Peas:
      Boom Boom Pow
      [The END]

      71 (61) Black Eyed Peas – Boom Boom Pow

      Boom Boom Pow? More like Zzzz Zzzz Snore!

      Click here for the video

      Pixie Lott:
      Boys And Girls
      [Turn It Up]

      55 (52) Pixie Lott – Boys And Girls

      Cheesy, forgettable pap pop.

      Click here to see the video

      JLS: Beat Again
      [JLS]

      47 (41) JLS: Beat Again

      Pop music by numbers.

      Click here to see the video

      David Guetta & Akon:
      Sexy Bitch
      [One Love]

      35 (36) David Guetta & Akon: Sexy Bitch

      Zzzzz….

      Click here to see the video

      Robbie Williams: Bodies
      [Reality Killed the Video Star]

      57 (37) Robbie Williams – Bodies

      Oh dear. Not a strong song by any stretch of the imagination, and when he was on X-Factor recently, he proved he can’tsing live for shit!

      Click here to see the video

      Chipmunk: Oopsy Daisy
      [I Am Chipmunk]

      39 (32) Chipmunk – Oopsy Daisy

      Tedious crap rap.

      Click here to see the video

      Taio Cruz:
      Break Your Heart
      [Rockstarr]

      32 (33) Taio Cruz – Break Your Heart

      The song’s a bit “Meh” but the girl in the video’s cute.

      Click here to see the video

      Sugababes: About A Girl
      [Sweet 7]

      23 (13) Sugababes – About A Girl

      I was hoping this would be a cover of the Nirvana song. Instead it’s just generic crap. How sad.

      Click here to see the video

      Alexandra Burke: Bad Boys
      [Overcome]

      18 (11) Alexandra Burke feat. Flo-rida – Bad Boys

      Leona-lite wails away about how exciting it is to be with bad boys… Yawn.

      Click here to see the video

      Black Eyed Peas:
      I Gotta Feeling
      [The END]

      17 (14) Black Eyed Peas – I Gotta Feeling

      Hmm… starts off tedious and repetitive… and just gets worse from there.

      “Let’s do it, let’s do it, let’s do it, do it, do it.” No, let’s not.

      Click here to see the video

      JLS: Everybody In Love
      [JLS]

      11 (6) JLS: Everybody In Love

      X-Factor runner-ups from last year and, it’s at this point where I’d say how much I hate it, but as a basic popsong it’s not actually too bad. It’s got quite a well-structured tune, even if it doesn’t do anything to break new ground.

      Click here to see the video

      Cheryl Cole:
      Fight For This Love
      [3 Words]

      8 (5) Cheryl Cole – Fight For This Loves

      The Girls Aloud singer’s debut solo release and…. it’s very dull.

      Click here to see the video

      Black Eyed Peas:
      Meet Me Halfway
      [The END]

      4 (2) Black Eyed Peas – Meet Me Halfway

      Meh.

      Click here to see the video

      X-Factor Finalists:
      You Are Not Alone

      2 (1) X Factor Finalists – You Are Not Alone

      Oh dear. Let’s all champion the dead paedo!

      Click here to see the video

      Peter Kay’s All Star Band:
      The Official BBC
      Children In Need Medley

      1 Peter Kay’s All Star Band: The Official BBC Children In Need Medley *1st week at No.1*

      Christ on a bike, this is fucking awful!! Peter Kay: Repeat DVD-releaser and general offender to all ears!

      Click here to see the video

      New releases :All the new releases info comes courtesy ofHaven Forum.co.uk

        Snoop Dogg: Gangsta Love
        [Malice N Wonderland]

        Nov 30th:

          Basshunter – I Promised Myself
          Chuckie & LMFAO – Let The Bass Kick In Miami Girl
          Darin feat Kat De Luna – Breathing Your Love
          David Gray and Annie Lennox – Full Steam Ahead
          Detachments – Circles (7”)
          Ella Chi – Gobstopper
          Ian Brown – Just Like You
          Ke$ha – Tik Tok
          Kid Sister – Right Hand Hi
          Lily Allen – Who’d Have Known
          Mini Viva – I Wish
          Newton Faulkner – Over And Out
          Pixie Lott – Cry Me Out
          Rhythms Del Mundo feat Killers – Hotel California
          Snoop Dogg – Gangsta Love
          Taio Cruz – No Other One
          Young Rebel Set – Walk On

        Dec 7th:

          Ash – tba (7”)
          Bandito – Rockin’ At The Disco
          The Boy Least Likely To – A Fairytale Ending
          Chris Brown feat Lil Wayne – I Can Transform Ya
          The Count & Sinden – Strange Things / Elephant 1234 (12”)[Limited]
          Enter Shikari – Wall
          Frankie & The Heartstrings – Hunger / Fragile (7” )[Limited]
          Frankie Goes To Hollywood – The Power Of Love
          Green Day – 21st Century Breakdown
          Mumford & Sons – Winter Winds (7”)
          The Prodigy – Invaders Must Die / Thunder
          Together – Hardcore Uproar 2009
          Vice – Bounce

        Dec 14th:

          3OH!3 – Starstrukk
          Backstreet Boys – Bigger
          George Michael – December Song
          Ian Carey – Shot Caller
          Lykke Li – Possibility
          Metro Station – Kelsey
          Patrick Wolf – Damaris (7”)
          Robbie Williams – You Know Me
          The Saturdays – Ego
          Sean Paul – Hold My Hand
          Shakira – Did It Again
          Taken By Trees – Anna
          Vampire Weekend – Cousins (7”)
          Whitney Houston – I Look To You
          X Factor Winner – tba

        Dec 21st:

          Ash – tba (7”)

        Dec 28th:

          Chipmunk – Look For Me
          Mr Hudson – Everything Is Broken

        Coming soon:

          75 Numbers – See Another Day
          Aggro – Culo
          A-ha – Shadowside
          Alcazar – Burning
          Amerie – Why R U
          Basic Element – Touch You Right Now
          The Big Pink – Velvet
          Cherri V – Skool Daze
          Daisy – Everytime
          Daniela – Push It Up
          Dolly Rockers – Boys Will Be Boys
          Donny & Marie Osmond – Vegas Love
          E-Type – Life
          Elin Lanto – Discotheque
          Eliza Lumley – Street Spirit
          Esmee Denters – Admit It
          Example – Won’t Go Quietly
          Jem – I Want You ToÂ…
          Jessie Malakouti – Standing Up For The Lonely [Nov]
          Julian Casablancas – 11th Dimension
          Kristinia DeBarge – Future Love
          Liz McClarnon – Not In Love [Nov]
          Matt & Kim – Daylight
          Nicki French – Aint No Smoke (Without Fire)
          Raygun – Waiting In Line
          Roisin Murphy – Demon Lover
          The Rumble Strips – Daniel
          Seal – I Am Your Man [Nov]
          Shena – Nasty Little Rumour
          Shirley Bassey – Our Time Is Now
          Sir Terry Wogan & Aled Jones – Silver Bells
          St Winifred’s School Choir – There’s No-one Quite Like Grandma
          Susan Boyle – Wild Horses [Nov]
          Urbnri feat Shaun Ryder – Georgy Best
          The Veronicas – Everything I’m Not
          Wamdue Project feat Jonathan Mendlesohn – Forgiveness
          Wilco feat Feist – You And I [Nov]

        2010:

          Alexandra Burke feat Ne-Yo – Good Night Good Morning
          Alicia Keys – Try Sleeping With A Broken Heart
          Ash – tba (7”) [4th Jan]
          Cheryl Cole – 3 Words
          Cold War Kids – Behave Yourself [18th Jan]
          Editors – You Don’t Know Love [25th Jan]
          Good Shoes – Under Control [4th Jan]
          Jay-Z feat Mr Hudson – Young Forever [18th Jan]
          Justin Bieber – One Time [11th Jan]
          Kaskade vs Deadmau5 – Move For Me [4th Jan]
          KCAT – Boys DonÂ’t Cry [25th Jan]
          Lightspeed Champion – Marlene (10”) [25th Jan]
          Los Campesinos – Romance Is Boring [15th Feb]
          Maps – Die Happy, Die Smiling [11th Jan]
          McLean – My Name [22nd Feb]
          Nadine Coyle – tba [Mar]
          Owl City – Fireflies [Jan]
          Paolo Nutini – 10/10 [11th Jan]
          Rihanna – The Wait Is Ova
          Seasick Steve – Never Go West [8th Feb]
          Simian Mobile Disco feat Beth Ditto – Cruel Intentions [4th Jan]
          Stereophonics – Could You Be The One [4th Jan]
          Sugababes – Wear My Kiss [8th Feb]
          These New Puritans – We Want War [11th Jan]
          Toni Braxton – Yesterday [22nd Feb]

      Top 75 ALBUM chart analysis :

      Rihanna: Rated R

        This week there are new entries for :

        • 1 Susan Boyle – I Dreamed A Dream
        • 16 Rihanna – Rated R
        • 17 Chris Moyles – The Parody Album
        • 18 The Priests – Harmony
        • 23 Mariah Carey – Memoirs Of An Imperfect Angel
        • 28 Janet Jackson – The Best
        • 30 UB40 – Best Of Labour Of Love
        • 31 Fron Male Voice Choir – Voices Of The Valley: Memory Lane
        • 32 Enya – The Very Best Of Enya
        • 38 Britney Spears – The Singles Collection
        • 50 Camilla Kerslake – Camilla Kerslake
        • 62 Scooter Under The Radar Over The Top

      Susan Boyle:
      I Dreamed A Dream

        The top 10 goes like this :

        • 1 Susan Boyle – I Dreamed A Dream
        • 2 JLS – JLS
        • 3 Black Eyed Peas – The E.N.D.
        • 4 Queen – Absolute Greatest
        • 5 Leona Lewis – Echo
        • 6 Michael Buble – Crazy Love
        • 7 Lady Gaga – The Fame
        • 8 Snow Patrol – Up To Now
        • 9 Robbie Williams – Reality Killed The Video Star
        • 10 Will Young – The Hits

      New releases :All the new releases info comes courtesy ofHaven Forum.co.uk

      Il Divo: Live In Barcelona 2009

        Nov 30th:

          Andrea Bocelli – My Christmas
          The Band Of The Coldstream Guards – Heroes
          Barry Manilow – In The Swing Of Christmas
          Faryl Smith – Wonderland
          Flo Rida – Flo Rida’s Hits
          Il Divo – Live In Barcelona 2009
          Neil Diamond – Cherry Cherry Christmas
          Pope Benedict XVI – Alma Mater: Music From The Vatican
          Rhydian Roberts – Our Homeland
          Seal – Hits
          Take That – The Greatest Day: The Circus Live
          Westlife – Where We Are

        Dec 7th:

          30 Seconds To Mars – This Is War
          Agnes – Release Me
          Beardsmith [GMTV’s Number 1 Family] – A Family Christmas
          Echo And The Bunnymen – Live At The Royal Albert Hall
          Snoop Dogg – Malice In Wonderland
          Timbaland – Shock Value 2
          Twiggy Frostbite – Through Fire
          Usher – Raymond vs. Raymond

        Dec 14th:

          Alicia Keys – The Element of Freedom
          Chris Brown – Graffiti

        Dec 28th:

          3OH!3 – Want

        Coming soon:

          1 Giant Leap – What About Me?
          Absent Elk – Absent Elk
          Ace Of Base – tba
          Alex Roots – Adrenaline Rush
          Andre 3000 – tba
          Annuals – Such Fun
          Audio Bullys – Sunday Night Fever
          Avril Lavigne – tba
          Beastie Boys – Hot Sauce Committee Part 1
          Big Boi – Sir Luscious Left FootÂ… Son Of Chico Dusty
          Blondie – tba
          Boom Bip – tba
          Cajun Dance Party – tba
          Captain – Distraction
          Cassie – tba
          Cat Power – Sun
          Cherri V – Fast Cars Silk Sheets and Favourite Guys
          Clipse – Till The Casket Drops
          The Count & Sinden – tba
          Courtney Love – Nobody’s Daughter
          Dani Harmer – tba
          Das Pop – Das Pop
          Deftones – Eros
          Delays – tba
          Detachments – tba
          Dolly Rockers – tba
          Dragonette – Fixin’ To Thrill
          Eminem – Relapse 2
          Erykah Badu – New Amerykah Part Two: Return Of The Ankh
          Eve – Flirt
          Example – Won’t Go Quietly
          The Faces – tba
          Fields – Hollow Mountains
          Findlay Brown – Love Will Find You
          Five For Fighting – Slice
          Hannah – tba
          Helen Love – Stick It (f*** Off)
          Ivyrise – Worldwide
          Joe Lean & The Jing Jang Jong – Joe Lean & The Jing Jang Jong
          Johnny Bennett – The Violet Hush
          Julian Velard – The Planeteer
          Kid British – It Was This Or Football: Second Half
          Laura Critchley – Laura
          Lifehouse – Smoke & Mirrors
          Lil Wayne – Rebirth
          Livvi Franc – Underground Sunshine
          Lucky Soul – Dark Times Ahead
          Luigi Masi – Save His Shoes
          Macy Gray – The Gray Life
          MadM (Melissa Auf der Maur) – Out Of Our Minds
          Melanie B – Reimagined
          Mpho – Pop Art
          Nicole Scherzinger – Her Name Is Nicole
          Operation Aloha – Operation Aloha
          P Diddy – Last Train To Paris [Nov]
          Panjabi MC – Indian Timing
          Preston – Whatever Forever
          Pretty Ricky – Eighties Babies
          Propellerheads – tba
          Raghav – Identity
          Raygun – Raygun
          Red Box – Plenty
          Scarlet BLONDE – Acerbic
          Stellastarr* – Civilised
          The Troubadours – The Troubadours
          Urbnri – Never Go To A Party With The ‘Ri
          Way Out West – We Love Machine

        2010:

          Adam Green – Minor Love [Jan]
          Aerosmith – tba
          All Angels – Fly Away [11th Jan]
          Alphabeat – The Spell [25th Jan]
          Amy Winehouse – tba
          Babybird – Ex-Maniac [Feb]
          Basia Bulat – Heart Of My Own [25th Jan]
          Bee Gees – Mythology: The 50th Anniversary Collection (4CD) [Mar]
          Black Box – Greatest Hits [1st Feb]
          Booty Luv – tba
          Boys Like Girls – Love Drunk
          Charlotte Gainsbourg – tba [Jan]
          Christina Aguilera – tba
          Cobra Starship – Hot Mess [18th Jan]
          Corinne Bailey Rae – The Sea [1st Feb]
          Crookers – Tons Of Friends [18th Jan]
          David Bowie – A Reality Tour [25th Jan]
          The Days – Atlantic Skies
          Delphic – Acolyte [11th Jan]
          Diana Vickers – tba
          The Divine Comedy – tba
          Doves – Best Of [Jan]
          Dr Dre – Detox
          Eels – End Times [18th Jan]
          Ellie Goulding – tba
          Erik Hassle – Pieces [15th Feb]
          Esmee Denters – Outta Here [11th Jan]
          Faithless – tba
          Field Music – Measure [15th Feb]
          Final Fantasy – Heartland [11th Jan]
          Florence Rawlings – A Fool In Love [Jan]
          Futureheaads – tba
          Fyfe Dangerfield – Fly Yellow Moon [Jan]
          Gary Numan – Prospects And Lies
          Gary Numan – Splinter
          General Fiasco – Buildings
          Gil Scott-Heron – I’m New Here
          Girls Can’t Catch – tba
          Good Charlotte – Cardiology [Mar/Apr]
          Good Shoes – No Hope No Future [18th Jan]
          Groove Armada – Black Light [Feb]
          Hot Club De Paris – tba [Feb]
          The Hot Rats – Turn Ons [Jan]
          Jack Savoretti – Harder Than Easy
          Jay Sean – All Or Nothing [15th Feb]
          Jennifer Lopez – tba
          JoJo – All I Want Is Everything
          Julian Perretta – Out Of My Head [Feb]
          Juliana Hatfield – Peace And Love [Feb]
          Kate Nash – tba
          Keisha Buchanan – tba
          Kylie Minogue – tba
          Laura Veirs – July Flame [11th Jan]
          LCD Soundsystem – tba [Mar]
          Lightspeed Champion – Life Is Sweet Nice To Meet You [1st Feb]
          Los Campesinos – Romance Is Boring [1st Feb]
          LostProphets – The Betrayed [18th Jan]
          The Magic Numbers – tba
          Massive Attack – Weather Underground [Feb]
          MGMT – Congratulations
          Midlake – The Courage of Others [1st Feb]
          Mini Viva – tba
          Missy Elliott – Block Party [Jan]
          Natalie Imbruglia – Come To Life [1st Feb]
          Nelly Furtado – tba
          Ocean Colour Scene – Saturday [1st Feb]
          OK Go – Influence Of The Blue Ray Of The Sunlight & Of The Blue Colour Of The Sky [18th Jan]
          Owl City – Ocean Eyes [Jan]
          Patrizio Buanne – Patrizio
          Peggy Sue – Fossils And Other Phantoms
          R Kelly – Untitled [18th Jan]
          Roots – How I Got Over
          Rose Elinor Dougall – Without Why
          Scissor Sisters – tba [Mar]
          Shakespears Sister – Songs From The Red Room
          Shania Twain – tba
          Sharon Corr – tba
          Skint & Demoralised – Love And Other Catastrophes
          The Soft Pack – The Soft Pack [1st Feb]
          Steve Mason – tba [Mar]
          The Streets – Computers And Blues [Feb]
          Sugababes – Sweet 7 [22nd Feb]
          These New Puritans – Hidden [18th Jan]
          Tom McRae – tba [Feb]
          Toni Braxton – tba [1st Mar]
          UB40 – Labour Of Love IV [Feb]
          Vampire Weekend – Contra [11th Jan]
          Yeasayer – Odd Blood [8th Feb]

        Review copyright © Dominic Robinson, 2009.

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