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Similar to the onscreen graffiti brought about by Channel 4, the BBC andUK Gold(see here),now Sky One are increasing the amount of onscreen crap that we can dowithout.
Even those largely passive to basic channel logos are finding that theinflux of 24/7 onscreen intrusions like “Jacko Monday 9pm” or TheSimpsons spinning doughnut with “6 days to go”, used to pre-empt the300th Episode, is just too much to bear nowadays.
It was bad enough with the constant use of a red dot to advertise theirinteractive services, despite the fact that simply telling us would be enoughto advertise them.
As of March 2003, Sky One’s controller is Sara Ramsden who, accordingto Sky bigwig Dawn Airey, is “a highly accomplished and creativetelevision executive who knows the Sky One market perfectly”. Is that so,Ms Airey. Well, I put it to you that she knows absolutely diddly squat abouther market if she thinks this is the way forward, and given the current levelof dumbing down on your channel I’m surprised either of you would know whichway round to sit on the toilet and would only know what to do with it ifit had a constant beaming logo shouting “DUMP HERE!”
There’s a Simpsons episode where Homer and family use the Flanders’ woodlandretreat, yet Ned has emblazoned everything with a Post-It note on how to useit, right down to “Fill me” on every section of the ice-cube tray.“With what, Ned(?)”, condescends Homer. “With water”, says thePost-It note beneath. That is where Sky One have now sunk.
Currently, the main annoyances from Sky One are:
- The red dot: We know these interactive services are available.They can be available without the need for a constant irritation onscreen,and since I record everything I watch first, ‘pressing red’ will make nodifference. I also long since disconnected my phone line from the Sky boxand part of it snapped off inside so it’s not being reconnected any time soon.
- ALL NEW: We know when programmes are all new. Only the Simpsons’new episodes aren’t shown week-in week-out and the reason we watch all theseprogrammes is because they’re new. We can work these things out for ourselves!
- End-credits interruptions: Continuity announcements and the screenbeing partially overtaken by clips of the next programme, the most offensiveof these being with the grating voice of ex-Radio 1 failure Claire Sturgess‘waffling over particular episodes of Futurama (Season 5) and Scrubs (Season 2),just a split-second after a character had died, about what cack was coming upnext. Just how bloody insensitive do they have to be?
- The Simpsons spinning doughnut: “6 Days to go”: As a pre-empt tothe Simpsons 300th episode, despite the fact that it isn’t the 300th one they’veshown, as they missed out The Cartridge Family, and add to that all theridiculous cuts they make to The Simpsons, Futurama and Family Guy,and don’t forget the onscreen logo that was “Jacko Monday 9pm” for afew days before it was broadcast – we know all these programmes are on and wedon’t need to be told as if we have the attention span of a Sky TelevisionExecutive.
If you feel equally aggrieved by all this, then click the following link which will forward youremail to the main Sky viewer email address, Sky One’s controller Sara Ramsden,the person who put her in charge, Dawn Airey and the head-honcho of the wholemess that is BSkyB, Tony Ball.A copy of the email will also go to Logo Free TV, whoare keeping a record of all the protests made against Sky.
As a certain Simpsons character would say at all this unnecessary onscreenintrusion, “Homer mad!!”
Note that as of Friday December 19th, 2003, as the year draws to a close, SkyOne, like Channel 4, appear to have relaxed their behaviour with the red dot and it no longerdominates the output like it used to. You can still ‘press red’ without it beingthere so let’s hope this continues.
If you include further text with your email, please keep the replies politeand to the point.
CLICK HERE TO COMPLAIN Click here for a list of comments made about Sky One so far.News page content input by Dominic Robinson, 2003.
Reviewer of movies, videogames and music since 1994. Aortic valve operation survivor from the same year. Running DVDfever.co.uk since 2000. Nobel Peace Prize winner 2021.