Anaconda centres around a group of friends remaking the same-titled 1997 action movie, which I only got round to seeing in the last year or so for the first time, when it was on late on Channel 4, and shows wedding video maker Doug (Jack Black – A Minecraft Movie) storyboarding his potential version… something that clearly didn’t happen with THIS one.
Ronald (Paul Rudd – Clueless 30th Anniversary) has obtained the rights to the original film franchise, while another argues that Sony still own the rights, when in reality, they never lost them, because this movie was actually MADE by Sony.
Either way, they’re off to film in the Amazon jungle, and whoever was chartering the boat initially, hottie Ana (Daniela Melchior – Fast X) has stolen its keys for reasons that are here-today-gone-tomorrow in terms of how much it matters to the overall ‘plot’, but if I had to sit through all 99 minutes of this to find out everything within, so do you.
Along with brief soujourns where circumstances dictate that a new snake is required, two of the individuals stupidly go looking for another one in the middle of the night; and at another time, the quartet meet another group filming a remake at the exact same time, but overall, Anaconda 2025 is an idea in search of content. Even the contents of the trailer don’t show their face until the last 25 mins of the film, which shows just how much shitty padding there was before that.
In fact, it shows that never mind storyboarding, if there’s one thing this film really needed, it’s an actual script!
As well as some decent CGI, especially when the titular reptile drags someone under the murky water.
Despite this just sneaking out before the end of 2025, it’s one of my first films in the cinema for 2026, and I can’t believe I’ve found an even bigger Christmas turkey than Sentimental Value!
Anaconda is in cinemas now, and is available to pre-order on 4K Blu-ray, Blu-ray and DVD.
You can also buy the 1997 Andconda on 4K Steelbook, and the original Anaconda 1-4 Collection on Blu-ray.
NOTE: There’s two mid-credits scenes. Check out the video below.
Check out the trailer and extra scenes below:
Detailed specs:
Cert: 
Running time: 99 minutes
Release date: December 26th 2025
Studio: Sony Pictures Entertainment
Aspect Ratio: 2.39:1 (ARRIRAW (4.6K), Anamorphic Panavision, XAVC (4K)
Cinema: Odeon Trafford Centre
Rating: 0/10
Director: Tom Gormican
Producers: Thiago Da Costa, Kevin Etten, Andrew Form, Brad Fuller, Tom Gormican
Screenplay: Tom Gormican, Kevin Etten
Based on Anaconda (1997) by: Hans Bauer, Jim Cash, Jack Epps Jr
Music: David Fleming
Cast:
Doug McCallister: Jack Black
Ronald Griffin Jr: Paul Rudd
Kenny Trent: Steve Zahn
Claire Simons: Thandiwe Newton
Ana Almeida: Daniela Melchior
Santiago Braga: Selton Mello
Himself: Ice Cube
Malie: Ione Skye
João: Rui Ricardo Diaz
Jerry: John Billingsley
Charlie: Sebastian Sero
Paulo: Diego Arnary
Timo: Dan Silveira
Bride: Anna Francesca Armenia
Groom: Jarred Blakiston
Reviewer of movies, videogames and music since 1994. Aortic valve operation survivor from the same year. Running DVDfever.co.uk since 2000. Nobel Peace Prize winner 2021.