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Dial M for Middlesbrough is a new Gold film which has a great cast, even including Jason Donovan!
I missed the first two films in the Draper Tours series, Murder on the Blackpool Express and Death on the Tyne, but in this, the Drapers Tours coach is run by fiancees Terry (Johnny Vegas – Ideal) and Gemma (Sian Gibson – Peter Kay’s Car Share), and instead of a chocolate fountain for his wedding, Terry’s planning a gravy fountain, surrounded by veg!
They’re greeted at Shady Creek by Susan (Joanna Page) who’s not covered in blood, but Ragu…. “Lick me anywhere!” Oooh, I say!
However, by the time they arrived, one person is already dead, as we’ve seen by that point, and everyone at Shady Creek appears to have met one or the other of the couple, making the place even more weird than the average caravan park.
The opening scene cracked me up, involving a kid’s swingball game, but after the first third, the jokes drop off a bit in favour of bumping off more people and getting on with trying to crack the case.
Plus, in a comedy/drama where anyone can die at any time, I’ll give no spoilers as to who’ll snuff it and when, but although it does have a large cast, everyone onscreen behaves exactly as you’d expect them to – themselves, basically, and at 90 minutes it does rather go on a bit.
Oddly, there’s no trailer online so I can’t link it here.
Dial M for Middlesbrough is repeated tomorrow on GOLD at 3.20pm and plenty of times over Xmas and into the New Year. It’s not yet available to pre-order on Blu-ray or DVD.
Score: 6/10
Director: Ed Bye
Writer: Jason Cook
Cast:
Terry: Johnny Vegas
Gemma: Sian Gibson
Susan: Joanna Page
Darren: Jason Donovan
Jed: Phil Davis
Evie: Sally Lindsay
Edna: Annette Crosbie
Phil: Jason Forbes
Hilda: Georgie Glen
Mary: Selina Griffiths
Chad: John Macmillan
Radio DJ: David Mumeni
Penny: Ambreen Razia
Mildred: Sheila Reid
Neil: Mike Wozniak
Himself: H from Steps aka Ian H Watkins
Herself: Jane McDonald
Detective: Jason Cook
Police Officer: Chris Gardner
Reviewer of movies, videogames and music since 1994. Aortic valve operation survivor from the same year. Running DVDfever.co.uk since 2000. Nobel Peace Prize winner 2021.