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Dan Owen reviews
I s s u e # 1 1 31 8 N o v e m b e r 2 0 0 4
FAHRENHEIT 9/11½
Michael Moore told ‘Variety’ that he met with Harvey Weinstein and they planto start working on Fahrenheit 9/11½.
Moore: “We want to get cameras rolling now and have it ready in two-threeyears. We want to document and commercialize it. Fifty-one percent of theAmerican people lacked information (in this election) and we want to educateand enlighten them. They weren’t told the truth. We’re communicators andit’s up to us to start doing it now. The official mourning period is overtoday and there is a silver lining – George W. Bush (right) is prohibited by lawfrom running again.”
Moore will also continue preparing his other film, Sicko, on the nationalhealth care industry. Moore says he and Weinstein are going ahead on theOscar campaign for Fahrenheit 9/11 in the Best Picture category and othercategories.
I AM LEGEND
Director Francis Lawrence (Constantine) is set to helm I Am Legend, thelatest name attached to this long-gestating remake of The Omega Man.
BOND 21
Ewan MacGregor is the latest name to be heavily rumoured to take on the 007role, while Colin Farrell has been tipped by ex-Bond Pierce Brosnan himself.Interestingly, director Martin Campbell, who helmed Goldeneye, is rumouredto have been approached to return to the franchise for Bond’s next mission.
TOY STORY 3
‘The Hollywood Reporter’ says that ‘Walt Disney Studios’ is actively movingahead with its sequel to Pixar Animation’s two Toy Story movies.
‘Disney’ is apparently in the process of setting up its own in-house digitalanimation facility in Glendale that will be used for the production of ToyStory 3.
David Stainton, president of ‘Walt Disney Feature Animation’, is developingthe sequel, as is Andrew Millstein, who headed the company’s now-shutteredanimation facility in Orlando and has already begun the process ofrecruiting animation heavyweights from rival animation studios and effectsshops.
‘Disney’ CEO Michael Eisner said in October that Disney was actually workingon two new sequels in the Toy Story series at the same time.
A spokeswoman for Disney elaborated, saying, “They’re working on differentstory ideas with the hopes there will be a Toy Story 3 and another afterthat.”
TRAILERSDark Water – Trailer 1(link)
Don’t tell me; sharks?
Nope.
Ships?
Nope.
Umm, scares?
Oh yes!
Goody! More info, please!
Right, Dark Water is another American remake of a recent Japanese horrorhit, originally directed by the guy who made Ringu (remade as The Ring), andwho is now directing the US remake Ring 2.
Ahh, so more signature psychological scares and creepy kids then?
Of course. In Dark Water, a mother and her young child move into anapartment block haunted by the spirit of a dead girl. Together they unravelthe mystery surrounding her death, and its link with the water after theirflat begins to flood.
Hmm, okay. So will it be better than the original?
Well, the cast are certainly very good – Jennifer Connelly (Requiem For ADream), Pete Postlethwaite (The Usual Suspects) and John C Reilly (BoogieNights), and there is the expected polish to the visuals… but it didn’tstrike me as being particularly engaging.
Ok, but one to watch?
Oh yes. After seeing the original, there is room for improvement – which Ihope the remake realizes – but I don’t see how they can top the original’sabsolutely heart-stopping sequence in the lift!
Son Of The Mask – Trailer 1(link)
A sequel to Jim Carrey’s The Mask, a full decade later?
Yes, indeed…
Is Jim Carrey in it?
Nope.
Who is?
Jamie Kennedy, Alan Cumming and Bob Hokins.
O-kay… so is this going to be good?
What do you think?
I think not.
You think right.
So I take it the trailer is bad?
That’s putting it mildly. The original was a fantastic wish-fulfilmentfantasy superhero movie, mixing Jim Carrey’s physical gift for comedy, someexcellent CGI and a mini gangster picture. It also gave the world CameronDiaz, and her infamous entrance scene… aaahhh…
So the sequel does away with all that?
Sadly yes. The director of Cats & Dogs (yes, someone THAT talented) isgiving us a terrible eyesore of crappy effects and ridiculously OTT setdesign. Remember the headache after watching The Cat In The Hat? Get theaspirin ready…
Okay, get it all off your chest…
Where to start. The plot has a baby endowed with The Mask’s abilities – cuelots of very unbelievable “super baby” bouncing around the house. Ugh. Thefamily’s pet dog (in a clear riff on the original’s Milo – it’s even thesame breed) puts The Mask on – cue bad Tom & Jerry styled malarkey betweenpooch and baby.
Jamie Kennedy (idiot from Scream franchise) puts The Mask on. Cue Kennedydoing a bad Jim Carrey impression with a terrible costume. There is also abonkers subplot with the Norse God Odin (Hoskins) despatching God OfMischief Loki (Cumming) to get The Mask back. Cue Alan Cumming doing hisbest Jim Carrey impression while erasing all goodwill gathered from X-Men 2.
Throw in some trite set-design that genuinely believes we all want to seethe world as a Dr Seuss cartoon (even after The Grinch and Cat In The Hatburned in hell), and leave to flounder next year amongst terrible reviewsand the world baying for Kennedy’s blood. Truly, truly awful.
One to avoid then?
Don’t try and be clever. I was a fan of 1994’s The Mask, but even I knew toleave it alone without Jim Carrey on board. The turkey of 2005 has beenrevealed early…
US TOP 10 (CINEMA)All figures are weekend box-office gross.
- 1. The Incredibles ($70.5m) (total to date: $143m)
- 2. The Polar Express ($23.3m)
- 3. After the Sunset ($11.1m)
- 4. Seed of Chucky ($8.77m)
- 5. Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason ($8.68m)
- 6. Ray ($8.41m)
- 7. The Grudge (2004) ($7.01m) (total to date: $99.2m)
- 8. Saw ($6.44m)
- 9. Shall We Dance ($4.02m)
- 10. Alfie ($2.74m)
UK TOP 10 (CINEMA)
- 1. Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason (£10.43m!)
- 2. The Grudge (2004) (£1.51m)
- 3. Shark Tale (£0.77m)
- 4. Veer Zaara (£0.4849m)
- 5. Bad Santa (£0.4841m)
- 6. Finding Neverland (£0.47m)
- 7. Ladies in Lavender (£0.42m)
- 8. Princess Diaries 2 (£0.27m)
- 9. Birth (£0.24m)
- 10. Anacondas (£0.19m)
** IN THE PIPELINE **All dates are U.K release dates, and are subject to change.
Email Dan Owen
Reviewer of movies, videogames and music since 1994. Aortic valve operation survivor from the same year. Running DVDfever.co.uk since 2000. Nobel Peace Prize winner 2021.