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(6-18-67, American Graffiti, Anyone Lived in a Pretty How Town, The Emperor, Filmmaker, Star Wars Episodes I-IV, THX 1138)
Producers:
Rick McCallum
Screenplay:
George Lucas and Jonathan Hales
Original Score :
John Williams
Cast :
Obi-Wan Kenobi: Ewan McGregor
Senator Padme Amidala: Natalie Portman
Anakin Skywalker: Hayden Christensen
Count Dooku/Darth Tyranus: Christopher Lee
Mace Windu: Samuel L Jackson
Yoda: Frank Oz
Supreme Chancellor Palpatine/Darth Sidious: Ian McDiarmid
Shmi Skywalker: Pernilla August
Jango Fett: Temeura Morrison
Senator Bail Organa: Jimmy Smits
Jar Jar Binks: Ahmed Best
C-3PO: Anthony Daniels
R2-D2: Kenny Baker
Boba Fett: Daniel Logan
Mine's bigger than yours.
I was prepared to wait for the eventual DVD release for Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones
given my disappointment of
Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace,
but a suggestion to see this installment on the big screen was made and while
it disappointed, it also didn't disappoint, because I was expecting the disappointment,
if you see what I mean.
The democratic Republic is on the verge of becoming the evil Empire we know
and love in episodes 4-6 and it's all courtesy of Count Dooku (Christopher Lee),
the main baddie this time round and making a decent job of his performance, but
you get the feeling that it's not particularly taxing for such an established
actor and you yearn for a return to the Dracula films.
Back to the plot though and Dooku wants to start up a war against the good
guys, who are awaiting the completion of a clone army apparently ordered by
someone on their side who Obi-Wan Kenobi (Ewan McGregor) isn't sure
whether they died before or after the order was placed.
Also, Senator Padme Amidala (Natalie Portman), formerly Queen Amidala,
starts the film heading to see the Supreme Chancellor Palpatine (Ian McDiarmid),
Jedi Master Mace Windu (Samuel L Jackson), Yoda (Frank Oz) and
others to place a vote on what to do next, but security is tighter than
September 11th and Padme is escorted back to Naboo with the grown-up
Anakin Skywalker (Hayden Christensen), who is the only actor to have
changed since the last film since this one is set ten years on, yet all the
rest look identical to the last time round, except for McGregor attempting to
look more and more like Kenneth Branagh with each scene.
In Attack of the Clones we're introduced to Jango Fett (Temeura Morrison)
and his soon-to-be-bounty hunter son Boba Fett (Daniel Logan), the former
zipping around on a cool jet-pack in order to make a monkey out of Obi-Wan.
Still with me?
Only the baddest mutha gets a purple lightsaber.
An overly-complex plot is made worse by the inclusion of an endless romantic
plot between Padme and Anakin which just adds to the tedium during the first
90 minutes, because very little happens to keep you interested, even though
it is possible to follow the plot if you're an adult. Children, on the other
hand, will have no chance and for them there's a lot less of Jar Jar Binks
(hooray, say the adults!) so it's less of a kiddie film and the increased
violence has garnered the movie the first ever PG-certificate in the series.
On the plus side, there's more of C-3PO and R2-D2 this time round, with
a few good one-liners that I won't spoil as they're deftly dropped in. I also
spotted an early classic from Obi-Wan to Anakin as the former quips
"you'll be the death of me".
However, quite often the film does feel like a lot of unlinked set pieces
as they lurch from one location with a long and complex name to another one,
with a couple of decent action scenes in the last hour, during which Samuel
L Jackson finally gets to wield a lightsaber around, as do Dooku and Yoda in
a fight between those two. Given that Yoda immediately before was hobbling
around on a stick, how come he can leap about straight after? That just doesn't
ring true compared to how we've seen him in the rest of the series to date.
There's some dodgy dialogue along the way, a lot to do with the blossoming
romance between the two young lovebirds, plus a few scenes that make for
entirely predictable outcomes. I won't divulge who pops their clogs in one
particular scene, but they've been gone for a long time and when someone they
know goes over in an attempt to rescue them, it's an age-old case of the
near-corpse staying barely alive just a few moments more to utter a few words
to their potential rescuer just before they shuffle off their mortal coil.
I mean, come on George Lucas, just how ridiculous is that?
The film also climaxes with a very unsatisfying feeling because it's gearing
up for a major war and... that'll come next time. It's like the story in
Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back
coming to a close, but going the same way because you know the rest of the
storyline will continue and the audience must be kept waiting.
For the last time I am NOT "Django" !
To close this review, the question begs to be asked - is it worth going to
see? Well, no. The first 90 minutes drags like there's no tomorrow and the
last hour is average and goes a short way to restore the balance from the
initial disappointment, despite containing a complete lack of suspense, but as
soon as it gets going, it ends.
However, for most of the paying audience, this will be the fifth Star Wars
outing they've seen on the big screen and so they'll make the trip one way
or another if only to see how the story progresses, or rather stagnates for
a time on its way to Episode III.
It really didn't need to be 2½ hours long though. Did George think it
was his turn to do a James Cameron ?
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Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. This category only includes cookies that ensures basic functionalities and security features of the website. These cookies do not store any personal information.
Any cookies that may not be particularly necessary for the website to function and is used specifically to collect user personal data via analytics, ads, other embedded contents are termed as non-necessary cookies. It is mandatory to procure user consent prior to running these cookies on your website.
