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The Bricklayer. Last month, it was The Beekeeper. Whoever next? The Butcher? The Baker? The Candlestick Maker?
Anyhoo, the attempted plot in this is that someone called Popov has popped off… having been killed off by the CIA, and journalist Greta Becker (Veronica Ferres – The Unforgiveable) has been murdered, and she’s not the first.
Meanwhile, this film’s baddie – Victor Radek (Clifton Collins Jr – Honey Boy) – is assumed to be dead, with his body lost at sea, but if he wasn’t alive, then we wouldn’t have this film, and he wouldn’t have been able to cap Becker.
Who can sort this out? Steve Vail, played by Aaron Eckhart (Midway), who’s almost 60, yet can still – bafflingly – deftly bump off baddies half his age, in generic fights in the rain, or elsewhere, all with huge Russian heavies who would normally snap him like a twig.
For the purposes of plot, Vail and Radek have worked together before, Vail will head off to Greece, with female CIA bod Kate Bannon (Nina Dobrev – The Out-Laws), and before long, old flame Tye Delson (Ilfenesh Hadera – Baywatch) will also pop up to add to the cast.
The Bricklayer is a monumnetally tedious movie which pulls no surprises, with the most boring fights ever, and a lot of CGI blood-spurting.
There’s a resaonable one-liner – if you can hear it amongst the mumbling of the dialogue – where he jokes about being President, obviusly having played one in the Olympus Has Fallen series.
However, Kate makes a terrible field agent. She speaks out loud in crowded spaces when on her earpiece, and fumbles around under a phone kiosk, in plain view, looking for a taped mobile that anyone could’ve found.
Add in a clichéd car chase where they drive through bins, someone’s just-opened their driver-side door, they drive through a brick wall without regard for what’s on the other side – or the fact that you’d probably not survive the impact anyway, there’s a parade walking through the streets at the same time… And at the end, both Vail and Kate have cuts to their faces, despite the windscreen being intact. Oh, and the baddie’s absconded, despite being in no fit state to do so.
Also, an ambulance opens its door with the same sound effect I’ve heard in GTA V.
As an aside, there’s also a goof, as highlighted on IMDB, where Aaron has to transfer Bitcoin via a USB flash drive, and that’s not how you transfer it.
Clearly, Renny Harlin‘s just given up. At least Statham made his film entertaining. This is just utterly risible, while Vail should just stick to building walls, and at one point we see him completing one, but without the last bit of cement. It’s like a brick has just fallen out and he places it back in. Erm…
So, maybe not lay bricks, either. Here, there is absolutely nothing to recommend this film, and Aaron Eckhart has just laid a massive turd.
The Bricklayer is on Sky Cinema in cinemas from Friday, and isn’t yet available to pre-order on Blu-ray or DVD. However, once announced, it will appear on the New DVD Blu-ray 3D and 4K releases UK list.
You can buy the Novel in Paperback and Kindle form, in the meantime, if you’re desperate, though.
Detailed specs:
Cert: 
Running time: 110 minutes
Release date: February 9th 2024
Studio: Sky Cinema
Aspect Ratio: 2.39:1
(Codex ARRIRAW(4.6K))
Rating: 0/10
Director: Renny Harlin
Producers: Gerard Butler, Jeffrey Greenstein, Avi Lerner, Yariv Lerner, Heidi Jo Markel, Trevor Short, Alan Siegel, Robert Van Norden, Les Weldon, Jonathan Yunger
Screenplay: Matt Johnson, Hanna Weg
Novel: Noah Boyd
Music: Walter Mair
Cast:
Steve Vail: Aaron Eckhart
Kate Bannon: Nina Dobrev
Victor Radek: Clifton Collins Jr
CIA Director O’Malley: Tim Blake Nelson
Tye Delson: Ilfenesh Hadera
Patricio: Oliver Trevena
Kostas Leontaris: Akis Sakellariou
Denis Stefanopoulos: Ori Pfeffer
Bertok: John T Woods
Triton: Konstantin Adaev
Finnegan: Zachary Willis
Foreman: David Kennedy
Greta Becker: Veronica Ferres
Lydia Radek: Johanna Harlin
Sylvie Radek: Anastasia Doumtsis
Alekos Melas: Michael Siriopoulos
Reviewer of movies, videogames and music since 1994. Aortic valve operation survivor from the same year. Running DVDfever.co.uk since 2000. Nobel Peace Prize winner 2021.