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Dan Owen reviews
2 0 0 6 R e t r o s p e c t i v eP a r t T w o
MAY
Not content with creating two of the most successful TV shows in history(Alias and Lost) J.J Abrams set his sights on the movies with MissionImpossible III. Incredibly, MI-III is possibly the best of the three moviesin terms of pure popcorn entertainment, but wasn’t the expected behemoth atthe box-office. Fingers were firmly pointed in the direction of Tom Cruise’swavering star power post-Katie Holmes and sofa-hopping on Oprah…
The summer’s biggest disappointment arrived with Tom Hanks, as he took thelead in The Da Vinci Code. The Dan Brown novel has been a remarkable hit fora few years now (I defy anybody not to spot a copy being read while onholiday…) so fans were left deflated by this uninspired adaptation. Orperhaps when the book is translated visually it’s easier to see itsweaknesses? But audience frustration didn’t damage the box-office - itseemed everyone wanted to see for themselves, and The Da Vinci Code becamethe second most successful film in 2006!
X-Men 3 was set to be another of 2006’s casualties, as original directorBryan Singer jumped ship to Superman. Renowned hack Brett Ratner took chargeand produced a competent but emotionally empty vehicle for some impressiveaction set-pieces. X3 just about saved itself from bombing through purestrength of CGI and audience investment with the characters and ongoingstory.
JUNE
The first notable remake of the year came with Poseidon, courtesy ofWolfgang Petersen (who has a thing with water following Das Boot and ThePerfect Storm). Sadly, Poseidon didn’t capture imaginations like the classic70s original, but it remains an enjoyable spectacle for disaster movie fans.
The Omen was the next “why bother?” remake of the year, essentially stickingwith the Richard Donner original but altering the cast. Unfortunately, allthe scares and foreboding was lacking in this retread. If the intent was tocash-in on the 6/6/6 release date, a reissue of the original would have beenpreferable.
Pirates Of The Caribbean 2 was the summer’s main hit and most lucrative filmof the year, with Johnny Depp and the gang returning for more high-octanenautical/supernatural jollity. Pirates 2 was a massive hit (indeed 1 out ofevery 4 DVDs sold at Christmas was Dead Man’s Chest) but it split critics -with many claiming it to be overlong, convoluted and uninspired.
Another CGI cartoon blew into theatres in the shape of Over The Hedge,another adventure featuring talking animals (all voices by celebs, ofcourse) that did amazing business. In fact, it became the 9th mostsuccessful film of the year!
JULY
Bryan Singer left the X-Men behind to bring The Man Of Steel back to cinemasin Superman Returns. By rights it should have been the hit of the summer,but it disappointed many insiders with its box-office take. Still, by nomeans a turkey, it gathered strong reviews and general praise for itsrespectful homage to Richard Donner’s original.
Another needless sequel arrived with The Fast & The Furious 3: cars, sexywomen, macho men = modest hit. Us Brits attempted to splice home-grown hitsHarry Potter and James Bond into Stormbreaker - a fun if forgettable pieceof junior espionage.
Pixar had mixed success with Cars. The CGI movie animation is no longer anovelty in itself, but Pixar can usually be relied upon to provide morestory, characterisation and heart than the competition. Cars is easily theirweakest movie, although visually it’s unsurpassed and… well, even sub-parPixar is streets ahead of stuff like Ice Age 2.
AUGUST
Whoever persuaded Bill Murray to return and voice Garfield in a sequelnobody wanted is anybody’s guess. I think money had a role to play. Garfield2 was marginally better than the first one, amazingly, but still a weakadaptation of Jim Davis’ iconic comic-strip. Again, 20 years too late,guys…
A big let-down in late-summer was Michael Mann’s Miami Vice. This straightupdate to his ’80s cop show was expected to do big business, but got burieddespite mostly positive reviews. It seemed people just weren’t interested.
Monster House was easily the year’s most undervalued CGI animation - andperhaps the best. It’s a classic throwback to the 80s adventures ofSpielberg’s era, beautifully animated and with a great story. Check it outif you’re one of the many millions who missed it at the cinema.
Jack Black had a bad year in 2006. Nacho Libre started the bad pennyrolling. It was a one-joke comedy with one laugh: that Black looks kindafunny dressed as a Mexican wrestler. Black is always good value, but themovie is lazy and lacked spark.
My Super Ex-Girlfriend was never going to be a classic, but its super-heroicspin on a relationship break-up was more fun than you’d imagine. Uma Thurmanis always good and perfectly cast here, while Luke Wilson finally began tocompete against his brother Owen at the movies. Mind you, if you thoughtJack Black had an annus horribilis, spare a thought for Wilson, whose othermovie, Idiocracy, was swept under the carpet by US distributors and goesunreleased in the UK to this day…
M. Night Shyamalan, that self-proclaimed father of modern horror, retuned,following the critical thrashing afforded The Village, with Lady In TheWater. A more savage drubbing ensued. To be honest, the film isn’t as bad asyou’d expect based on reviews, but there’s a pervasive sense that Shyamalanbelieves his own hype far, far too much. It’s time to re-examine The SixthSense and get your groove back Night.
2006 Retrospective Part One –2006 Retrospective Part Three –2006 Retrospective Part Four -Page Content copyright © Dan Owen, 2007.
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Reviewer of movies, videogames and music since 1994. Aortic valve operation survivor from the same year. Running DVDfever.co.uk since 2000. Nobel Peace Prize winner 2021.