Bill leads the new cinema releases & trailers – w/e September 18th 2015

billThis weekend there are six new films out for you to choose from: ‘Horrible Histories’ comedy in Bill, comedy with Jack Black in The D Train, action in Solace, comedy/drama in A Walk In The Woods, more alleged comedy in Aloha, and action in the alps in Everest.

Bill asks what really happened during Shakespeare’s ‘Lost Years’? Hopeless lute player Bill Shakespeare leaves his home to follow his dream…

Starring Mathew Baynton, Simon Farnaby, Martha Howe-Douglas, Jim Howick, Laurence Rickard, Ben Willbond, Helen McCrory, Damian Lewis, Rufus Jones and Justin Edwards, this is basically like a big-screen version of Horrible Histories, and all the better for it.

Now, can we have a movie version of Sorry I’ve Got No Head? For a ticket for that, why, I would pay… £1000!

Hit or Miss? Verdict: Hit!

The D Train stars Jack Black as Dan Landsman, the head of a high school reunion committee, who travels to Los Angeles to track down the most popular guy from his graduating class – Oliver Lawless (James Marsden) – and convince him to go to the reunion, once he learned that he’s rich and famous.

Oddly, this film has two directors – Andrew Mogel and Jarrad Paul – which is rarely a good sign.

The D Train also stars Jeffrey Tambor and looks pretty good.

Hit or Miss? Verdict: Hit!

Solace stars Anthony Hopkins as psychic John Clancy, working with FBI agents Agent Joe Merriweather (Jeffrey Dean Morgan) and Agent Katherine Cowles (Abbie Cornish), in order to hunt down a so-far nameless serial killer played by Colin Farrell.

With Farrell always staying one step ahead of the cops, it’s a well-worn premise but one which looks, here, it could turn into a pretty decent thriller, given its style.

Hit or Miss? Verdict: Hit!

A Walk in the Woods stars Robert Redford as the writer Bill Bryson who, after spending two decades in England, returns to the US where he decides the best way to connect with his homeland is to hike the Appalachian Trail with one of his oldest friends, Katz (Nick Nolte).

In this new comedy adventure, celebrated travel writer, Bill Bryson, instead of retiring to enjoy his loving and beautiful wife, and large and happy family, challenges himself to hike the Appalachian Trail – 2,200 miles of America’s most unspoiled, spectacular and rugged countryside from Georgia to Maine. The peace and tranquility he hopes to find, though, is anything but, once he agrees to being accompanied by the only person he can find willing to join him on the trek – his long lost and former friend Katz, a down-on-his-luck serial philanderer who, after a lifetime of relying on his charm and wits to keep one step ahead of the law – sees the trip as a way to sneak out of paying some debts and sneak into one last adventure before its too late. The trouble is, the two have a completely different definition of the word, “adventure”. Now they’re about to find out that when you push yourself to the edge, the real fun begins.

Also starring Kristen Schaal, Emma Thompson, Mary Steenburgen and Nick Offerman (We’re The Millers), this looks like one of thos bittersweet comedies aimed at the OAP market although it is, surprisingly, a growing market in the wake of films like The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel.

Hit or Miss? Verdict: Miss!

Aloha centres on 37-year-old disgraced US weapons consultant Brian Gilcrest (Bradley Cooper, right), who is disliked by mostly everyone. His only friend is a techie named Jeremy “a super-smart and highly aware computer”.

As a response to aggression from China, Gilcrest is deployed to a dormant military base in Hawaii to supervise the launch of an advanced spy satellite. Together with the anal and humorless Major Lisa Ng, he must secure the blessings of the native Hawaiian council before the launch. Gilcrest also gets a chance to meet with Tracy, the one love of his life who got away, along with her husband and two kids. On the island he discovers himself.

Aloha is directed by Cameron Crowe and also stars Emma Stone, Rachel McAdams, Bill Murray, John Krasinski, Jay Baruchel, Alec Baldwin and Danny McBride, and it’s been put back two weeks to this Friday, and I’m not wholly sold on it, but no doubt women will flock to see him grinning away on the big screen as usual.

Hit or Miss? Verdict: Miss!

Premiering last Friday on IMAX screens only, Everest is not a film about the life of Everest Windows magnate Ted Moult, but in fact it’s about a climbing expedition on Mt. Everest which is devastated by a severe snow storm.

The film stars Keira Knightley, Robin Wright, Josh Brolin, Jason Clarke, Sam Worthington, Clive Standen, Emily Watson and Tom Goodman-Hill. While this looks good, despite the scale of Everest the mountain, I’m not sure whether it’s worth a watch on the big screen. And based on reviews, Jake Gyllenhaal isn’t actually in it that much, and a lot of the rest of it sounds like a TV movie of the week.

Hit or Miss? Verdict: Maybe!