Skip to content
Phillip Schofield is a MASSIVE LIAR!
He said Cast Away is the first time he’s been in front of a camera since being fingered at This Morning. No, you also did that BBC interview with Moley Rajan.
The former TV presenter seems to think it’s all about the fact he came out as gay, and thought anyone in the real world needed to care. No, Schofe. If you want to be gay, that’s your business, and it’s fine… unless you’ve been lying to your wife and family for the past 30 years. THEN, it becomes an issue, because lying is not cool.
Schofe was fingered when he was caught with a runner from This Morning who I’ll just name here as… hmm… Mr Snrub. They were seen together when the lad was 20, but it’s rumoured they were first introduced to each other from Snrub being the age of 15. Presumably in the broom cupboard.
Schofield also states in the opening episode (of three) that since his Dad had a well-kitted-out shed with everything you need, when he was a kid, he’d go to his Dad, hold up his hands and say, “Dad, can I have a piece of wood THIS long?”
Unfortunately, for him, getting wood was part of the problem.
After a bit of training, on his desert island he needs to learn how to start a fire. I was hoping he’d get it going, then tie himself to stake to recreate Joan of Arc’s last moments.
He also comments that he managed to collect some water and it has “a lovely shade of urine”. Well, if it’s wee-wee to drink that you need, I’m sure that the general UK public would be happy to provide an inexhaustible supply…
Phillip also adds about one’s lifespan: “We’re here for a very short space of time. What’s the point in wasting it, regardless (of certain events that have led him to this)?” So, he’s blaming everyone else, and not himself.
Another comment comes while cutting up fruit, that he “doesn’t like sticky hands”. F’nar! F’nar!
He also claims some bloke wanted to give him “a massive hug”. Well, I’ll add that to the list of things that didn’t happen… unless it was accompanied by a Glasgow kiss!
Oh, and right on cue, Phillip Schofield pretended to cry for the camera. And a camera which has a tremendous amount of battery life for the ten days he’s there. I wonder if he can tell me where he got them from on Amazon?
And when will he start talking to a football called Wilson?
His final line, as he tries to get shelter sorted for the night: “I’m utterly buggered… if it goes dark soon”.
Well, that escalated quickly!
And let’s have some tweets…
https://twitter.com/DVDfever2/status/1840848370719662481
https://twitter.com/DVDfever2/status/1840851098778677499
https://twitter.com/DVDfever2/status/1840854323531506137
https://twitter.com/DVDfever2/status/1840855339379347669
https://twitter.com/DVDfever2/status/1840856091447513473
https://twitter.com/DVDfever2/status/1840857081353552371
https://twitter.com/DVDfever2/status/1840857542471364740
https://twitter.com/DVDfever2/status/1840857983321854445
UPDATE Episode 2:
UPDATE Episode 2:
Phillip Schofield: Cast Away continues tomorrow on Channel 5 at 9pm, and runs for four episodes, up until Thursday this week.
It’s unlkely to be released on Blu-ray or DVD, but you can buy more wholesome content from the New DVD, Blu-ray, 3D and 4K releases UK page.
Reviewer of movies, videogames and music since 1994. Aortic valve operation survivor from the same year. Running DVDfever.co.uk since 2000. Nobel Peace Prize winner 2021.