The Box is ITV’s latest attempt at a gameshow during primetime, on this occasion with supposed celebs being thrown into random locations, so it’s Destination X and The Chase Around The World… again.
They’re first each stuck in a massive portaloo. Something makes them contstruct a ‘token’ which dictates which portaloo they go back into, the opening scene making it look like they might even get transported to the unsafe area on top of the Seattle Space Needle… but no, it’s usually a muddy field.
Firstly, The Box is really dragged out, there was a part where they have to dig through sand for some reason, plus the pointless first task means one will have immunity, while others might be going home quickly… which I don’t think was even followed through, anyway. Unless I dropped off.
An egg and spoon race seems to last the majority of the programe…. and this is ITV’s primetime entertainment! I’d also completely forgotten why they were only walking approximately halfway and then running back to the start. I’ve no idea what’s going on, other than I’m wasting an hour of my life with this.
Oh… it was later explained, but I still failed to care. They appear to make up rules as they go along, and the supposed climax to the game was based around rock/paper/scissors! WTF?
Yes, The Box is going to bomb worse than Graham Norton’s The Neighbourhood. The only plus for it is the frequent use of classical music, such as Tchaikovsky’s Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy, and In The Hall of the Mountain King from Manic Miner, but originally from Grieg.
Of those taking part, these include alleged comedian Ellie Taylor, who’s one of the most talent-free individuals I’ve ever coem across, and just looks so fucking fake all the time. Then there’s the awful Jenny Ryan – the worst Chaser, after Paul Sinha, some guy who’s a ‘Youtuber’, and The Apprentice’s Sarrrrrrrra Daaaayveeeeez.
Naturally, no spoilers, since if I had to lose an hour of my life to find out, then so do you.
The Box begins tonight at 8.15pm. The first two episodes are now available to watch on ITVX.
It’s not yet available to pre-order on Blu-ray or DVD, but when it is, it will be listed on the New DVD, Blu-ray, 3D and 4K releases UK page.
Running time: 45 minutes per episode
Release date: September 5th 2026
Format: 1.78:1
Director: Eddie Lewis
Host: Gary Lineker
Reviewer of movies, videogames and music since 1994. Aortic valve operation survivor from the same year. Running DVDfever.co.uk since 2000. Nobel Peace Prize winner 2021.